new.

So many things new. New job. Old friends newly relocated to my city. New book approved for publication (book 2!). New, cold air. New rain. New pain. A new (old) cherry red suitcase and a new (old) map of a city I’ve never been. A new decade entered into with more and more certainty, more and more […]

to measure years.

Last night we drove to Silverlake to see a band I’ve loved for fifteen years. It seems lately I’ve been reconnecting with the favorite musicians of my lifetime, people who sung me to sleep when I was tripping my way through college, people who reminded me that not all lost loves were great. The people who […]

on turning thirty-

-like a lady. In thirty easy steps. 1) Wear black. 2) Then make everyone else wear black. 3) Then hang black streamers from the chandelier of your parents’ house and have your mom buy a black cake. A haunted house. The black napkins and black paper plates are too expensive. Make do with what you have. […]

the last of the year.

  It is raining in Los Angeles, which in reality is a very good and useful thing but in my brain becomes conflated, too-meaningful, drenched in metaphor. Like the city is being cleaned away, being readied, being prepared for a brand new year- two thousand and fifteen! An inconceivable amount of time and yet just […]

haunted.

I dream about my grandmother’s house often. The cheap blue siding. The rock wall that lined the backyard. The shed I only saw open one or two times, a cobwebbed structure that smelled of mold and damp. A basement that was half-finished and half-unfinished, the unfinished side stretching back for what seemed, at my young […]

mt. san jacinto, part 1.

  An hour into the hike, I had mentally given up. The elevation was the toughest part; I couldn’t catch my breath unless I was completely motionless and sitting. But once I sat, it was hard to get up and start walking again. I compromised by leaning against trees, counting to thirty, making myself move […]

yosemite, pt. 1

The drive to Yosemite takes almost five hours and my eleven-day old niece, Harper, sleeps the entire way. We get a late start made even later by a coffee shop that takes twenty minutes to fill our order. We drive across the new Bay Bridge and continue east for what seems like an eternity. The […]

the day before.

    This week arrived out of nowhere. This week! I’ve been waiting for this week for two years, for my entire life. I’ve been imagining the way it will go. I’m imagining the ways in which it will be important. I’ve been quiet about it. I’ve been letting it come to me; I haven’t […]