manoa falls.

I never feel so — I dunno: right with the world, at peace, in my element, etc, pick whatever cliched turn of phrase you like — as when I’m in the middle of a forest. This has everything to do with growing up in homes where you couldn’t see the road from the front lawn, where […]

december first.

When I tried to think of a title for this post, the first thing that popped into my head was December First- which is when I’m actually sitting down to put it together. Of course, it won’t publish until tomorrow, but the sentiment remains the same. The “wherethefuckhastheyeargone” sentiment that keeps creeping up behind me and scaring me half […]

mosaics.

Yesterday I stood in front of my car for five full minutes, blinking blinking blinking, hoping one of those blinks would erase what I was seeing: the entirety of my windshield one splintered, broken mess. I was out of breath and dripping sweat from a run that, moments before, I had been proud of. I […]

lost roll.

The happiest accident in the world is misplacing a roll of film and finding it two and a half years later. A first trip to London. A first trip to Joshua Tree. A first trip to Ojai. A world in black and white and light leaks. A roll devoid of another human, so it looks a little bit […]

new new york.

An impromptu trip to New York in June (it feels like this summer is nothing except one impromptu trip to the East Coast) to visit my farthest-away niece. Family photographs and familiar places made unfamiliar with the passing of time. New museums and old museums in the span of a few quick days. At the […]

great room.

  Sometimes, waking early before the others, wandering the rooms wrapped in a blanket or drinking my tea in the empty kitchen, I had that most rare of feelings, the sense that the world, so consistently overwhelming and incomprehensible, in fact has an order, oblique as it may seem, and I a place within it.  […]

magic.

  Last week my mother and I went on vacation together, something we’ve done every year since I was a kid. Back then it was camping in Massachusetts and now it’s usually Florida, where this year the heat was oppressive and the humidity unavoidable. We found air-conditioned buildings to squat in and spent one long hour […]

jaimee in the poppies.

We drove to the poppy fields in the middle of the week, knowing most of them would be dead in the heat and drought of early spring but both needing to get out of the city, feeling the strain of working from home creeping up on us. We left in the late morning and there […]

on turning thirty-

-like a lady. In thirty easy steps. 1) Wear black. 2) Then make everyone else wear black. 3) Then hang black streamers from the chandelier of your parents’ house and have your mom buy a black cake. A haunted house. The black napkins and black paper plates are too expensive. Make do with what you have. […]

faerie glen.

Almost two years ago, my trip to the Scottish Highlands was bookended by visits to the Faerie Glen, a tiny little set of hills and small lakes that is often forgone in favor of flashier scenery. But this was a place my travel partner and makeshift tour guide had been before and fallen in love […]